The kids on the show are monsters. They kick, hit, spit... the list is endless. The thing is, it's really easy to see that it's not their fault. At. All. It's the parents! They don't listen to their children. They're inconsistent. They're lazy. They're impatient. They're rude. They're obviously the cause of all of the issues in their own household. And, (before all of you that are parents start freaking out) - this is exactly what scares me.
The parents on these shows are not bad people. Some of them aren't great, but generally they're not mean spirited, they don't do these things intentionally. They are good people trying to do good things and bring up good children. They're just doing it wrong.
Can they see that though? Nope. That's why they apply for these horrible TV shows - if they could see their flaws as easily as we can, there's no way they would put them out for the world to judge in that way. Most of these people genuinely want to do a better job for their kids and be better people, if they could see their flaws as easily as we can, they would fix them. Or at least try.
So this is where I turn off the show and freak out. I know where these people are in terms of being blind to their own mistakes. I've had several times in my life where people have offered home truths to me, and it hits me hard, because I just don't see it until it's pointed out and it becomes all too obvious.
So - what if when I have children, they are monsters, and it's all my fault. Will I figure it out before it's too late? Will I be able to see my own mistakes and fix them, or will I be blind to them and blame it all on the completely wrong things?
I'm a long way from kids of my own, but for a very long time Ive been aware of just how blind we are to our own selves. I think it makes me more tolerant of people I don't know well, wondering about their side of the story. Of course my impatience counter-balances that intuition with people I do know well... sorry! I'm working on that.
As a parent, can you see these things? Is it as hard as it looks?
If you're not a parent, do you see your own mistakes? Do you ever stop and think that the person you can't stand might just not know?